This week, Gladfly presents a reprise of the popular lonely-hearts column, "Dear Checker," by renowned relationship expert Dr. Chester E. Finn, Jr.
Dear Checker:
I love my husband, but these days he only seems to want to spend time with his friends. Every night he's out at the bar; every weekend he's playing golf or watching sports with his buddies. I want to give him freedom to be "with the guys," but I also need quality time with him. How can I make him understand my needs?
Lonely in Louisville
Dear Lonely:
Time on task is indeed an essential element of successful learning, just as forcefully intervening in failing schools is the only way to ensure that they change. Sure, it's prescriptive, but that's what accountability means. Otherwise, what's to keep unsuccessful schools from staying as they are? Somebody needs to trigger palpable, even unpleasant reforms in faltering schools and districts lest they continue to gyp children of a proper education.
Dear Checker:
I'm in a quandary. My 22-year-old son is engaged to a women he adores. But I've heard from people who know her that she has a pretty shady history - run-ins with the law, a string of boyfriends she's jilted, even an affair or two with married men. I love my son and don't want him to make a mistake. But I'm afraid that if I tell him, he'll get angry and I'll lose any influence I might have. How should I approach him?
Worried in Waukegan
Dear Worried:
Beware of child-centered strategies. As usual with vexing policy dilemmas, the education field has developed a conventional wisdom about how to resolve the one that troubles you and yet, as so often happens, the conventional wisdom in this case is wrong: we're told to improve the quantity and quality of school leadership by adding more formal training and certification requirements to those already in place. We're advised that one must first teach before one can possibly lead teachers. And we're cautioned, therefore, that the best if not the only place to look for tomorrow's leaders is within the ranks of today's educators. This is wrong.
Dear Checker:
My boyfriend and I have been dating for three years now. We've talked about marriage, but always put it off because we weren't ready. Now, I've been offered a job in a city on the West Coast. It's a dream position, but I love my boyfriend and would happily accept a proposal if he offered. Should I stay here and hope for a ring, or strike out on my own?
Confused in Canton
Dear Confused:
Many routes can carry one to leadership positions in education. The problem is needless red tape and certification barriers. Whatever one's view of No Child Left Behind, it's a valiant effort to bring needed change to American education. Where is the National School Boards Association on this? Singing the establishment anthem, which piously declares its support for NCLB's intentions and then proceeds to pick apart almost every significant aspect of the law as unworkable. What message does that send to America's 15,000 local school boards? It's akin to Dad saying, "Your mother told you to eat your spinach but you really don't have to unless it's sprinkled with sugar and eaten in front of TV. With ice cream to follow."
Dear Checker:
I'm president of mid-sized, progressive education union advancing the interests of teachers, and I just think you have the sweetest eyes! Are you dating anyone? Could we maybe get together for a drink and talk about Title I some time?
S.F. in D.C.
Dear S.F.
Appearances can be deceiving. Let us be grateful for the legacy of the late Albert Shanker. But let us also speak the truth about how the unions - both unions, alas - usually behave when the national spotlight is turned off and their swarming lobbyists descend upon legislative chambers and the rooms where school boards engage in collective bargaining. With the rarest of exceptions, the unions' behavior pattern in those settings is to stonewall serious education reforms of both the standards-based and competition-based genres.
For more answers to your relationship questions, see the foreword from Dr. Chester E. Finn, Jr.'s latest book on love, life, and laughter, Grading the Systems: The Guide to State Standards, Tests, and Accountability Systems. Available for downloading here.