The Gadfly is currently speeding through cyber space to your inboxes, but in the meantime, take a gander at Fordham's 2010 resolutions. Sure, they're mostly for other people (after all, the role of a Gadfly is to stick its nose in other people's business!) but don't miss number 10, which is surely the most exciting resolution of all. (And, p.s. you can also read the 'Fly online here or subscribe to the email version here.)
1. President Barack Obama resolves to shut down New York City's rubber rooms--right after he closes Guantanamo. Unlike with Gitmo terrorists, though, he shouldn't bother looking for jurisdictions to take those teachers.
2. Gene Wilhoit and Dane Lind resolve to get Texas and Alaska to sign on to the Common Core initiative by adding curricular units on "Lone Star History and The Art of Secession" and "The Contributions of Hockey Moms to American Society."
3. Michelle Rhee resolves not to appear on John Merrow's??Newshour segment more than once a week.
4. Brad Ferro, public school gym teacher in the Bronx and current rubber-room inmate, resolves to take anger-management classes, at least while the reality TV show cameras are rolling.
5. Greg Toppo resolves to keep his tweets to fewer than ten a day.
6. Senator Harkin resolves to learn the value of a dollar.
7. Representative Kline resolves to accept that the federal government isn't the Antichrist.
8. Whitney Tilson resolves to use the phrase "Stop the Presses!!!" no more than once a week (and with no more than three accompanying exclamation points).
9. Randi Weingarten resolves to cede Dennis Van Roekel some of her airtime--but not too much.
10. If you hadn't yet noticed, Gadfly is about to turn ten years old. To commemorate this crossroads, he's decided he needs a makeover--new clothes, new ???do, new style. But he wants you, his loyal readers, to take a peek in the dressing room as he tries on his new duds. So we'll be checking in with you, in the form of a survey, over the next few weeks to figure out how the ???Fly should look in the ???10s. Stay tuned.
--Stafford Palmieri
