Arne Duncan and his fans have been hinting that he's going to be tough on the teachers union tomorrow at??its big annual confab. But will he speak these truths?
"Look, we bailed your behinds??out to the tune of $100 billion. So I don't want to hear any yapping when our No Child Left Behind proposal comes out.""Now, about those generous teacher pensions. We value your service, we really do. But there's no possible way we can afford to pay 60 or 70 or 80 percent of your salary, indexed to inflation, for the rest of your lives. At least without bankrupting our schools. The other option is pushing the retirement age for teachers to 70. Did I mention how I think teaching is a wonderful lifelong career?"
"One last thing: about the teacher obesity epidemic. Come on folks, we need to set a good example here."
(This is one reason I wasn't selected to write speeches for the Secretary.)