Photo credit: Me at 6" by Chris Gladis is licensed under CC BY-ND 2.0.
For years, so-called “no excuses” charter schools have cultivated student perseverance, grit, and “growth mindsets” in the belief that such traits are essential to adult success. The theory seemed right, but it turns out to be completely wrong. New research indicates that the planet’s richest and most powerful denizens demonstrate altogether different character traits: arrogance, zealotry, self-promotion, narcissism, and an unwavering willingness to run roughshod over others.
This startling but unimpeachable analysis arose from recently uncovered videos of Stanford’s famous “marshmallow experiment.” In one riveting 1979 clip, three-year-old Travis arches an eyebrow when a marshmallow is placed on the table in front of him. When asked if he can wait for ten minutes before eating it, he snaps, “Do I look like a poopy-face? I wouldn’t wait 10 minutes for an entire #$&% bag of marshmallows. I specifically said white truffles!” The child then throws the marshmallow at the cowering researcher and storms out of camera range. Offscreen, he’s then heard demanding a black car. “And I damn well better not be kept waiting,” he wails. “You idiots have already made me late for Mommy and Me Yoga!”
Researchers at the time classified children like this one as having poor self-control and labeled them as marshmallow-test #fails. In 2012, however, an aging former member of Walter Mischel’s team was channel surfing and found herself transfixed by a guest on CNBC’s Squawk Box. It was Travis, whose mobile transportation app had since made him a billionaire. When she and other researchers reviewed their old files, they identified several Travis-like subjects who had gone on to extraordinary success as hedge fund managers (e.g., Whitney Tilson, founder and managing partner of Kase Capital Management), CEOs of technology start-ups, world-class chefs, rulers of small but filthy rich duchies and sheikdoms, big-law partners, and—in at least one case—the helmsman of a well-financed education reform organization.
“Grit and perseverance are still valuable noncognitive skills,” concedes researcher Angela Duckworth. “But only for minions, lackeys, and members of one’s entourage.”
While research on these “new new non-cog skills” is still in its infancy, a small number of charter schools have already begun experimenting with methods for inculcating the character traits in their student populations. One such school is KIPP Privilege, a new elementary school on the Upper East Side. Bucking standard“no excuses” mainstays like enthusiasm and maturity, it rewards children with swag for attention-seeking, shade-throwing, and humble-bragging. Classrooms are named after capitalist juggernauts like Exxon-Mobil, the Donald, Floyd “Money” Mayweather, Halliburton, and Kim Kardashian. And hallway walls provide inspiration from the likes of Kanye West (“My greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.”), Mark Cuban (“Those passions aren’t worth a nickel.”), and Michael Jordan (There may be no "I" in team, "but there is an 'I' in win." ). The school’s motto? “Brush your shoulders off.”
It’s easy to identify the non-cognitive traits that set children up to be ambitious careerists and personal promoters. The challenge for principal Karol Burgiss and her staff is how to cultivate those traits. Teachers at KIPP Privilege are betting heavily on exclusionary group creation. “The ability to develop in-demand, exclusionary cliques, complete with merciless membership protocols, is especially indicative of future dominance,” says Burgiss.
Look out, world. The future leaders of the world are here—and they don’t give a $#% what you think.
