After dividing the entire school into subgroups, as demanded by the No Child Left Behind act, officials at Marsteller Middle School in Passaic, New York, discovered that only seventh grader Jimmy Patterson, 13, did not fall within one of the 83 categories identified by the district. "What can I say?" said one school official. "We have 35 left-handed Khmers and a passel of tone-deaf Aussies. And plenty more. Jimmy just doesn't fit anywhere else, so I guess he's the majority." Patterson, son of local insurance agent James and homemaker Martha Patterson, is described by his teachers as "more white-bread than a watercress sandwich." The Passaic Currant reports that the teenager enjoys baseball, apple pie, and X-Box. The Fordham Foundation's Chester Finn lauded Patterson's designation, saying, "It's about time that the administration at Marsteller stopped hiding the school's learning gap behind Jimmy's average test scores."
"Caucasian child is school majority," Passaic Currant, March 26, 2004, http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/gatesmug1.html